I was reading Stephanie Howell's blog this morning and she has a post about women that blog that make their lives look perfect. I guess there is somewhat of a debate about. She posted some things about her and her life that were not perfect and challenged her readers to do the same. So here goes:
1. Anyone who knows me well knows that my biggest pet peeve is people who don't take care of their kids. Women who take their kids into public places with dirty faces and bed head drive me crazy. Secretly, though, Chelsey almost ruined me on that. It was impossible to keep her hands and face clean. I would pull her out of the tub and by the time I drained the water, she was into something and had a filthy face. Since then, I have relaxed my rules a bit. If you show up at my house, chances are Ellie will have something on her face-most likely she pulled something out of the garbage and ate it. I do still try to have her clean when we go to town.
2. I love to cook, but sometimes I don't have the energy to do it. I don't know if I have fluctuating hormones or what, but there are days that I literally have to drag myself out of bed. If the kids didn't need food, I probably would never cook for myself.
3. I would not say that I am a materialistic person, but sometimes I struggle with greed and wanting more. I want a bigger, newer home even though I absolutely love my home. I want a new car even though my Yukon has served us so well for the past 7 years and is paid for. I want to stay home with my kids, but I also want some of my own "mad money". I want to go on nice vacations, but I know they will never happen. I would also call myself a cluttery person. My house is not messy, but there is too much stuff and not enough storage places.
4. I am not affectionate enough with my kids, husband, or other people in my life. I start out really well when the kids are little. It's easy to hug and kiss them. Then they grow up a bit and it feels really weird to hug and kiss on them. Then they grow more and it embarrasses them when you tell them you love them so I just kind of quit doing it as often as I should. I know that my kids know I love them and would do anything for them, but I also know I should tell them more.
5. My house is not as clean as I like it. With 5 kids and a husband I really shouldn't expect perfection, but there is so much more that I should be doing. There are usually at least a few dishes in the sink and garbage that needs taken out. There are always full laundry hampers and there is probably some kind of leftovers in my fridge growing mold. I've learned to live with this, but when people come over, all I think about is the things that haven't been done.
Well, there you have it. All of the secret things about me that I am not so proud of. My life is so not perfect. I am very blessed and I live a good life, but it is not perfect. I think that's the point of self evaluation, though. Identify your weak areas and fix them. No one else can make you happy, you have to make yourself happy! Life is about learning and growing and using your current circumstances to help you make your future better.
I can appreciate what you are saying. Last night I went to a mother/daughter thing at the church with Grandma, and Sharon Heiner gave a talk...it was all about accepting who we are and making the best of it. She said she was only born with one thing...but she always wished to be pretty, skinny, rich, talented, etc. She then gave a story that I'd never heard before, that talked about a lady that wanted to marry a tall, rich, handsome guy and thought her fairy godmother would make it happen...anyway, in the end the fairy godmother doesn't show up until she's married, raised a family, etc. Then she turns her down and keeps what really matters to her. I think we all think someone else has it made and is better at everything. I look at you and wish I could have been a better mother...like you are...and in the end, that's the very most important thing. I love you and I'm so proud of you and the things you do.
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